Scuba Dive

At a party last night I was trying to explain the finer points of underwater communications to a non-diver.  Though I found the conversation stimulating, I’m pretty sure I did a bad job, since I left the party phone-numberless.  I’ve revised my thoughts into the highlights below.

Highlights of Underwater Communication
Signal: one hand, fist clenched, thumb pointing up
Meaning:  I want to surface now because I am: tired, hungry, low on air, bored, needing a margarita, or I just don’t like diving with you anymore.

Signal:  hand held flat, palm down, making a sawing motion across the neck
Meaning:  I’m out of air.  Unless I sprout gills I’ll be dead soon.

Signal: hand held flat, fingers pointing up on the top of the head like a shark fin
Meaning:  A shark fin.  Rest of shark attached.  Swim fast.

Signal: hand held flat, palm touching mouth
Meaning: I am low on air.  I am about to rip your air regulator out of your mouth so I can use it.  Or, you can pass it to me.  Your choice.

Signal:  index and middle finger touching the mask, then pointing outwards at an object
Meaning:  There is something very interesting that you must see.  Ha, ha, I saw it first.